Hindsight is 20/20. This is an understatement. I find myself looking back on decisions I made when I was younger. In a way it is crazy how much my decisions may have impacted my life today. Do you ever find yourself looking back wondering what if? Those what if questions hit me like a ton of bricks. How did I not know how I felt until almost 15 years later?
How did I not see that I was the only one to blame? I have made many mistakes in life, as we all have. It is important to remember that although we cannot go back in time. We can take responsibility for our actions because it is never too late to say sorry. I hope that one day I have the chance to. Grief is a raw emotion that can be unleashed at any moment.
I guess today all I am compelled to say is I am grieving the loss of you, and your friendship. You will probably never read this, and if you do, hell I don’t even know if you will know it is about you. I wanted to put it out there. This is how I am feeling today.
I am SURE that many of my readers have felt this way before, and it’s not really the best of the emotions. Don’t be ashamed about your feelings. Don’t beat yourself up, for thinking about the what ifs, when you are happy in your life today. I am not saying that it is healthy to live in the past, but growing and learning from your past will make you happier in the future. Most importantly, live for today, because tomorrow is NEVER promised.
With All My Love,
Courtney Chase
